taken from my journal
April 26, 2019
Myrtle Beach, South Carolina

A pledge, unbreakable…
until I don’t get my way.
A promise, from now until the end of time…
or until a better offer comes along.
I love you,
just don’t make me mad.
I’ll stay with you,
for better? sure.
for worse? don’t make me prove it.
I’ll be true -
as true as feels right to me - most definitely to your face,
sometimes even behind it.
BUT
Don’t ask too much.
Don’t expect me to always be there.
A commitment of convenience - that’s what I’m after.
Jesus? Don’t press it.
I like Him on the pages, but not in reality.

These are the vows of the American church.
Tepid, self-centered, easy.
And I didn’t realize it until they were broken, a no fault divorce pursued by people who said they loved Him so much yet looked so little like Him.